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Doing New Year's Resolutions Differently: How Therapy Can Help

January 17, 2025
As we get deeper into January, most people experience some setbacks in sticking to the intentions they’ve set for the new year. Using therapy to support New Year's resolutions can be an effective way to ensure that your goals are not just set, but achieved in a meaningful and sustainable way. Therapy provides a structured environment to explore your motivations, address obstacles, and build lasting habits. Here's how therapy can support your resolutions:

1. Clarifying Your Goals

  • Specificity: Therapy can help you define your resolutions in a clear, measurable, and realistic way. New Year's resolutions are vague (e.g., "I want to be healthier"), but a therapist can guide you to articulate more concrete goals (e.g., "I will exercise for 30 minutes, three times a week" or "I will eat at least one vegetable with each meal").

  • Motivations: During therapy sessions, you can explore the underlying reasons for your resolutions. For example, if your goal is to "get in shape," therapy can help you understand whether the motivation is related to physical health, self-esteem, or perhaps social comparison. This deeper understanding makes your resolutions more personal and grounded.

2. Overcoming Mental Barriers

  • Negative Self-Talk: Your therapist can help you identify and challenge any limiting beliefs or negative thought patterns (like "I'm not capable of change" or "I've failed before, so I’ll fail again") that could hinder progress. Reframing these beliefs can help you move beyond being constrained by them. 

  • Procrastination and Perfectionism: Many people struggle with getting started or staying consistent. A therapist can help you understand the root causes of procrastination, whether it’s fear of failure, perfectionism, or a lack of self-compassion, and work with you to develop strategies to overcome these hurdles.

3. Building Accountability

  • External Support: Checking in with your therapist on your progress regularly can create external accountability. Knowing that you will discuss your progress in your next session can motivate you to take consistent action.

  • Setting Realistic Expectations: Sometimes, we set ourselves up for failure by being overly ambitious. Therapy can help you break down your larger goals into smaller, achievable steps, making it easier to stay on track.

4. Developing Healthy Habits

  • Behavioural Change Techniques: Your therapist may introduce you to specific techniques (like habit stacking, reward systems, or cognitive restructuring) that can help you build sustainable habits over time.

  • Emotional Regulation: Many resolutions fail when emotional challenges arise, such as stress or disappointment. Therapy can teach you emotional regulation skills, mindfulness, or stress-management techniques, helping you stay grounded when things get tough.

5. Addressing Setbacks and Relapse

  • Self-Compassion: It’s natural to slip up along the way. Developing self-compassion can help you avoid giving up on your goals when setbacks occur. A therapist can guide you through the process of reflecting on what went wrong, adjusting your strategy, and moving forward without guilt.

  • Resilience: Therapy can foster emotional resilience, enabling you to bounce back from challenges and continue working toward your goals even if you encounter setbacks. Building resilience can help you view challenges as opportunities for growth rather than signs of failure.

6. Long-Term Vision

  • Exploring Deeper Values: Sometimes, people struggle with consistency because their resolutions aren’t aligned with their deeper values or life priorities. Dialoguing with an outside support can help you connect your resolutions to your broader vision of who you want to be or what you want your life to look like.

  • Vision Boards or Journaling: Consider exploring different ways of visualizing your success, such as creating vision boards or journaling about how achieving your resolution will impact your life. This can create a sense of purpose and excitement around your goals.

7. Enhancing Self-Awareness

  • Patterns and Triggers: Therapy can help you identify patterns in your behaviour that sabotage your resolutions, such as certain emotional triggers that lead to unhealthy habits. Once you're aware of these, you can develop strategies to avoid or manage them more effectively.

  • Mindfulness: Mindfulness practices, often incorporated into therapy, can help you stay present and grounded in the moment, making it easier to resist impulsive behaviours and stay focused on your long-term goals.

8. Improving Relationships

  • Social Support: Your therapist can help you explore how your relationships might be influencing your ability to stick to your resolutions. For instance, do you have a supportive network that encourages healthy behaviours? Or, do certain relationships undermine your progress? A therapist can work with you to set healthy boundaries and strengthen relationships that align with your goals.

Incorporating therapy into your New Year's resolution process is about more than just achieving short-term goals; it’s about building the mental and emotional resilience to sustain long-lasting change. Connecting with supportive environments and people can foster personal growth and success beyond the New Year.